Forever Untitled

As I let a tear fall from my eye

I'm reminded of all the pain i ever felt in my entire life

Please don't let my smile or the battering of my eyes fool you

For there is an aching heart hiding beneath the facade I alone have created

For what seems like a life time,

I have tried to please everyone first and me second

and for that I suffer pain, insecurities, doubt and false hope

Layer by layer more pain is created

I break away from one, to only be confronted by another

I fall to my knees until they bloody red, as though they are resting upon salt

Every word I say comes from my heart

Every tear I shed comes from my pain

And every okay I say is beyond redundant

Let this be a lesson learned for both of us

I don't care about you anymore

I live for me and your existence has now become mediocre

Shall I no longer live the life I was never meant to live

Nor shall I carry the burden of caring about what others want or think of me

This is a new era, one that lives within me

And one that is all about my needs....

drunken truth

everyday people tell you what they think at the time is the truth

but its more then likely that what they are telling you is the watered down version of the truth

im telling you this because i've done it and i still do it

at one point in your life you was either told or will be told that the truth comes out when your drunk but that is only half the truth

the truth does come out but don't believe for one second that it cant be changed to fit the story

liquor is just an excuse to allow people like you and me to act on emotions that we would not normally do when we are sober

dont ask

dont question

just understand that this is the.....

DRUNKEN TRUTH

Tell Me!

Tell me all the things you hold back

Tell me all the things your feeling

Telling me all the things you can't tell no one else

Dont think of me "them"

Think of me as one part that makes you whole

I ask you to be real with me because I will forever be real with you

To me...

You are the beats my heart takes

The brush of fresh air that I breath into my lungs

You are the first thing I think of when I open my eyes and the last thing I think of when I close my eyes

You are everything to me

So Tell me, Tell me, Tell me....

Everything on your mind, today tomorrow and everyday to come

Scared

Being scared is an emotion that has no age limit

And it tends to hit you at the simple moments in your life that seem trivial

I'm Scared...

Not scared of what you think of me

Not even scared of how you perceive me

But I am scared of you taking advantage of me

Putting my heart on the line is the biggest step I think I can take

For it gives you the chance to play with it, break it and sometimes even mend it

So this is me putting my fears to the side

Putting my heart on the line

And facing the scared feelings inside me face to face

So here it goes...

Its to early to tell so I know I don't love

Its been months since we meet so I'm sure that I'm into you

Its been weeks since my feelings made them self clear

So lets not wait days to make us clear

I want you and I want you now

I've already been scared so you don't need to play that card

Just step to me like a man, hold your head up high

And....

Take me down!

Scared?....Not no more

Some other kind of love

You ask me how I feel

And I always answer you with a "fine"

You ask me am I sure 

I look at you and ask why wouldn't be

You say you just wanted to make sure,

So I say, oh okay and we leave it at that, with nothing else to say

When your gone out my sight

I sigh...

In relief? In pain? or just in amazement?......

In amazement!

Because God has delivered me from so much grief and when he gave me you

I felt special, like he gave me more love then anyone else

I mean he made you just for me, what more proof do I need?

Were not perfect,

You leave the toilet seat up

I have my make up all over the bathroom

You like sports

I like to shop

In other words, tedious shit that makes us who we are.....LOL

Yet we tend to do perfect things...At least we think so

We tell each other Good Morning, every morning

I tell you I miss you after being apart for just a day

You call me to hear my voice when you haven't seen me in a few hours

There's more, but I think they get the point

I LOVE YOU

YOU LOVE ME

WE LOVE EACH OTHER

Our love is not like....

His love, Her love, or even Their love

Our love is different

Our love is.... 

Some other kind of love

A define love!, 

Yeah that is some other kind of love.

Imagination

**This is a combination of a Shakespearean sonnet and a blank verse**

Can I tell you the truth without judgment?

The truth is I have been deceiving you

Would you be mad that my feelings are numb?

You're looking and pining from afar, but

I'm the star in the sky that can't be reached.

And though you can never touch, you try hard.

Please stop! Because I won't ever be yours

But to be honest, I want to feel love.

That feeling of eternal bliss; so sweet,

To feel the feelings and the emotions!

To feel your touch, to feel your lips, your kiss

I want to be real and not just a thought

Sadly, I'm just your imagination.

**Note**

I say that this is a combination of a Shakespearean sonnet and a blank verse because though it maintains the structure of a Shakespearean sonnet, I followed the rhyme scheme of a blank verse.

A piece of my thoughts

Being young is just a moment in time

Living life to its fullest is what we are expected to do

We thrive, live, explore, wonder & grow

We go on living life until the day we cant live it no more

As time passes and I grow a little older, I learn some things I wish I never had to learn

but then I understand and deal with the fact that I must learn some things

even if it seems to hard for me to bare

But then there are the things in life that makes al of your troubles seem insignificant...

There are the people you call friends and the friends you call family

Its is only because of you that I seem to make it through the problems I have,

whether your next to me or not

It's the strength that you gave me

The spirt that you help me build up

The push you gave me to keep moving

And the advice that you forced in my head

I love you all!!!